Spoiled rotten

I am so spoiled. By my family, my friends, my employer but most of all by Semper. I swear this horse has ruined me. Spoiled me rotten. Let me explain. Semper is the kind of horse that says things like "What can I do to make you happy" & "whatever you want me to do, I'll try my hardest". He rarely has one of those moments that he thinks that it isn't worth his time to try. When you get after him he just melts. He is crushed. He is a pleaser.

Ms Lily on the other hand is a real piece of work. She has absolutely no attention span. No patience and a real "know it all" attitude. She can be going along just fine and then something will catch her attention and she shuts off quicker than a light switch. I have been riding her at least 4 days a week. I started out just doing simple things and not asking to much of her. Each ride I would expect a little more and basically I would get it. But what I noticed is that other things would fall apart. She would not want to lead. She would not want to back. She would not want to move off my leg. Things she knows how to do, but for some unknown reason would decide that today she didn't know how to get them done. She would complete whatever it was I was asking for but then not want to lead like a lady back to the barn. Or she would have done really nice leg yields at the first part of our ride and then all of a sudden - nothing. I was kind of letting it go thinking that it was just her loosing focus. Maybe it was too much for her all at once. I rode her in a lesson and she was doing really well two tracking and then just quit. She saw something shiny and she was gone. Got really pushy and just didn't want to work anymore. I ask her again to move off my leg and she just pushed me right back. I told her with a gentle bump of my spur "get over there" - again nothing. I jabbed her with my spur - nothing. Then I just went to town on her. I took my foot out of my stirrup and just kicked the crap out of her and she finally gave me one small step. I stopped and waited. Then gently asked again, then told her and she moved. I let her stop again and then gently asked again and she moved. She went the other way fine. Brain back on. The next night I wanted to take her for a walk to cool her off. She literally did not want to lead. She would drag behind, shake her head, and then when I asked her to put a move on it, she would run into me. I felt as though I was pulling a ton of bricks up hill. So here we go again. I went and got a lunge whip and asked her to stay with me. She ran into me again. Nothing infuriates me more than to have a horse run into me. And she knew exactly what she was doing. So she gets a lesson in leading that took about 20 minutes of my time to get her back to being lady like.

Here is the thing, she is an alpha female. She is very herd dominate and will fight for position when in the herd. I know that. With this horse I can never let any little thing go. Fix it right then and there. She doesn't give a darn if I am happy or not. All she cares about is if SHE is happy. She thinks she is the boss and when I let something go, I am reinforcing her belief that she is the boss. I hate these types of relationships. She is a tough little horse and she will take a lot before she says uncle. I leave the barn feeling like all I ever do is get after her. She is getting better with every ride, but because of the constant struggle with her I wasn't feeling successful. I hear TL in my head telling me "to ride the horse I am on" "raise your expectations" and "this is going to make you a better rider". I sure hope she is right. This constant battle of wills is tough. I wonder if she will ever concede that I am the boss and want to please or is this just how our relationship is going to be?